I have a compulsion. I realise that my already documented obsessive compulsive collecting habits will mean that this does not come as much of a surprise but I was not intending to shock. If I had been intending to shock, I would have opened with a sentence more along the lines of "I have a compulsion to sniff warm bicycle seats" (which, I hasten to add, I don't have and anyone who says that's in no way shocking will get a clip right round the lughole).
No, it's a fairly innocuous compulsion but a compulsion nonetheless. You see, I have a minor stationery fetish (no, not a fetish for immobile objects, that's the wrong type of stationery - although the object in question doesn't really move around). It's not an indiscriminate fetish, either; it's quite specific. I have an obsession with notebooks.
I can't help it. Whenever I see notebooks, I have a strong urge to buy them. Fair enough, you might say, for someone who professes to be fond of writing. The thing is, though, that I never fill a notebook up. Not a personal one, anyway. Work ones? Sure, I've filled tons of the buggers. But I'm not gonna want to go back and re-read any of them (no offence, Work). My room is littered* with notebooks which are only a third or half filled before being discarded for a newer model.
This blog has, in fact, been drafted in my current notebook which might well be my favouritest notebook ever. It's a black hardback Moleskine notebook with a ribbon you can use as a bookmark and a black elasticated band on the back cover which you can pull over the front to keep it closed; I bought 'cause it has that elasticated band kind of like what Indiana Jones' notebook does. Look, if I didn't think I was a tragic case before now then you obviously haven't been paying enough attention, have you?
P.S. For those of you who like statistics, I'm currently on track for a full month's worth of blog posting, having posted a blog every day this December so far. It's also the longest continuous run of blogs that I have ever posted. So there you go, Fact Fans.
* Not literally, I'm quite tidy, really