Monday, 8 June 2009

Why Dinosaurs Are Brilliant

By That Baldy Fella, Aged 6 And A Half (Mentally)

Number 1 - They are very big. This means that they can stomp on things which are small which, as we all know, is very cool.

Number 2 - They have sharp teeth for biting things. Except for the vegetarian ones who have have flattened teeth but are usually very big instead which makes them ideal for stomping things (see point number 1).

Number 3 - They make places like the Natural History Museum much more fun because they have bones of these big lizard which were either very bitey or very stompy or both.

Number 4 - Godzilla is a dinosaur and Godzilla is cool therefore dinosaurs are cool.

Number 5 - Jurassic Park, Jurassic Park: The Lost World and Jurassic Park III.

Number 6 - The Land That Time Forgot, One Of Our Dinosaurs Is Missing, The Valley Of Gwangi.

Number 7 - And, of course, Walking With Dinosaurs, people.

Number 8 - Basically, they're brills and all other extinct animals are bobbins.

The End


kapgaf said...

Number 1 : yes, stomping on small things is cool, except of course when you’re one of the small things being stomped on.

Number 2 : is it their teeth or the vegetarian dinosaurs themselves that are big and ideal for stomping things ? I think I already know the answer but would just like some clarification because if it’s the teeth, I don’t see how they can stomp (although they can of course chomp).

Number 3 : nothing can make the Natural History Museum fun. The last time I went there (about 40 years ago) it was just full of very old things.

Number 4 : isn’t that a sophism ?

Numbers 5 to 7 : all ok (although it took me a while to factor in that One of Our Dinosaurs is Miossing is today’s deliberate spelling mistake).

Number 8 : brills and bobbins ? I’m amazed at how the English language has changed : the adjective brill is now a noun and I’ve never heard of bobbins (except for winding wool or thread around). Before you get Tish Tash to explain about American expressions, I wouldn’t mind having a little update on English ones!

P.S. Harking back to yesterday, I’d be happy to give some insight into living with the French.

Kurt said...

Dinosaurs improve everything. Once I was applying for a loan and when they saw my credit score they were going to say no. And then a dinosaur ate them. So while it didn't improve my credit score it did improve my enjoyment of that bank.

Anonymous said...

Oh heck yeah!! ^.^

Cant Hardly Wait said...

Thanks for making me smart, dude.

That Baldy Fella said...

kapgaf - Now, now, I'll not have any Natural History Museum bashing round these parts...
What spelling mistake? (Mwuhahahaha, the power of editing!)
Bobbins = Manchester rhyming alng. Bobbins of cotton = rotten.

Kurt - Must change banks.

BarbiePhobia - Never a truer word spoke.

Cant Hardly Wait - Here to help!

Belle said...

I'm DEFINITELY going to the O2. It looks amazing!

That Baldy Fella said...

I've got my ticket. I fully expect that I may actually wet myself a little bit with excitement.